It Hurts To Be A Looser
It seems not everyone is properly equipped to be a Flasher. This is the ultimate example of a Looser.
In Pursuit of Excellence
Since Bill Clinton has come to the conclusion that he will NEVER reside in the White House again (even as First Man), he is making a run at an even more difficult task.
Since Bill Clinton has come to the conclusion that he will NEVER reside in the White House again (even as First Man), he is making a run at an even more difficult task.
This is a quick video clip of Bill's current pursuit. Sorry Bill.
Some goals are just unattainable, no matter how persistent the pursuer is.
A True Story (Sort Of)
A man takes the day off work and decides to go out golfing. He is on the second hole when he notices a frog sitting next to the green. He thinks nothing of it and is about to shoot when he hears,
"Croak - 9 Iron."
The man looks around and doesn't see anyone. Again, he hears, "Croak - 9 Iron." He looks at the frog and decides to prove the frog wrong, puts the club away, and grabs a 9 iron.
Boom!
He hits it 10 inches from the cup. He is shocked. He says to the frog, "Wow that's amazing. You must be a lucky frog, eh?
The frog replies, "Croak - Lucky frog."
The man decides to take the frog with him to the next hole. "What do you think frog?" the man asks.
"Croak - 3 wood."
The guy takes out a 3 wood and, Boom! Hole in one. The man is befuddled and doesn't know what to say. By the end of the day, the man golfed the best game of golf in his life and asks the frog, "OK where to next?"
"Croak - 9 Iron."
The man looks around and doesn't see anyone. Again, he hears, "Croak - 9 Iron." He looks at the frog and decides to prove the frog wrong, puts the club away, and grabs a 9 iron.
Boom!
He hits it 10 inches from the cup. He is shocked. He says to the frog, "Wow that's amazing. You must be a lucky frog, eh?
The frog replies, "Croak - Lucky frog."
The man decides to take the frog with him to the next hole. "What do you think frog?" the man asks.
"Croak - 3 wood."
The guy takes out a 3 wood and, Boom! Hole in one. The man is befuddled and doesn't know what to say. By the end of the day, the man golfed the best game of golf in his life and asks the frog, "OK where to next?"
The frog replies, "Croak - Las Vegas."
They go to Las Vegas and the guy says, "OK frog, now what?"
The frog says, "Croak - Roulette."
Upon approaching the roulette table, The man asks, "What do you think I should bet?"
The frog replies, Ribbit $3000, black 6."
Now the man knows that the odds for him to win are not in his favor, but after the golf game the man figures what the heck, and the Boom - A Win! Tons of cash comes sliding back across the table. The man takes his winnings and buys the best room in the hotel. He sits the frog down and says, "Frog, I don't know how to repay you. You've won me all this money and I am forever grateful."
The frog replies, "Croak - Kiss Me."
He figures why not, since after all the frog did for him, he deserves it. With a kiss, the frog turns into a gorgeous 15-year-old girl.
"And that, your honor, is how this 15 year old girl ended up in my room. So help me God or my name is not William Jefferson Clinton."
They go to Las Vegas and the guy says, "OK frog, now what?"
The frog says, "Croak - Roulette."
Upon approaching the roulette table, The man asks, "What do you think I should bet?"
The frog replies, Ribbit $3000, black 6."
Now the man knows that the odds for him to win are not in his favor, but after the golf game the man figures what the heck, and the Boom - A Win! Tons of cash comes sliding back across the table. The man takes his winnings and buys the best room in the hotel. He sits the frog down and says, "Frog, I don't know how to repay you. You've won me all this money and I am forever grateful."
The frog replies, "Croak - Kiss Me."
He figures why not, since after all the frog did for him, he deserves it. With a kiss, the frog turns into a gorgeous 15-year-old girl.
"And that, your honor, is how this 15 year old girl ended up in my room. So help me God or my name is not William Jefferson Clinton."
Clinton Speak
What Clinton says and What he really means
When He Says: I was not lying.
He Means: I was standing up and she was lying.
When He Says: It wasn't adultery.
He Means: She wasn't even an adult.
When He Says: I did not have oral sex with her.
He Means: She was having oral sex with me.
When He Says: It is time to get on with the nations' business.
He Means: If this isn't off the front page by tomorrow, I'm bombing Iraq.
When He Says: I was not lying.
He Means: I was standing up and she was lying.
When He Says: It wasn't adultery.
He Means: She wasn't even an adult.
When He Says: I did not have oral sex with her.
He Means: She was having oral sex with me.
When He Says: It is time to get on with the nations' business.
He Means: If this isn't off the front page by tomorrow, I'm bombing Iraq.
