You Drive - They Fly

Magic Lantern

A blonde, a redhead, and a brunette were all lost in the desert. They found a magic lanern and rubbed it. A genie popped out and granted them each one wish.

The redhead wished to be back home. Poof! She was back home.
The brunette wished to be at home with her family. Poof! She was back home with her family.

The blonde said, "Awwww, I wish my friends were back here." and Poof….

Each of You Get One Wish!

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Painting the Porch

A blonde, wanting to earn some money, decided to hire herself out as a handyman-type and started canvassing a wealthy neighborhood.

She went to the front door of the first house and asked the owner if he had any jobs for her to do.

"Well, you can paint my porch. How much will you charge?"

The blonde said, "How about 50 dollars?"

The man agreed and told her that the paint and ladders that she might need were in the garage.

The man's wife, inside the house, heard the conversation and said to her husband, "Does she realize that the porch goes all the way around the house?"

The man replied, "She should. She was standing on the porch."

A short time later, the blonde came to the door to collect her money.

"You're finished already?" he asked.

"Yes," the blonde answered, "and I had paint left over, so I gave it two coats.

"Impressed, the man reached in his pocket for the $50.

"And by the way," the blonde added, "that's not a Porsche, it's a Ferrari."

A "Ferrari"

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A "Porch"

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Not Gonna Repeat Myself


A guy is having a drink in a very dark bar. He leans over to the big woman next to him and says; “Do you wanna hear a funny blonde joke?”

The blonde woman replies; “Well, before you tell me that joke, you should know something. I’m blond, six feet tall, 210 pounds, and I’m a professional triathlete and bodybuilder.

Also the blonde woman sitting next to me is 6'2", weighs 220 pounds, and she’s a professional wrestler. And next to her is a blond who is 6"5", weighs 250 pounds, and she’s a professional kickboxer. Now, do you still want to tell that blond joke

The guy thinks about it a second and says; “No, not if I’m gonna have to explain it three times.”


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