she was so blond 1

she was so blond 2

she was so blond 3

The Importance of Puntuation

Blond Short Stories

She Was So Blond

it takes her two hours to watch 60 Minutes. if she spoke her mind, she'd probably be speechless. she studied for a blood test - and failed. she thought Boyz II Men was a day care center. she thought Meow Mix was a record for cats. she thought she needed a token to get on Soul Train. she sold the car for gas money. when she saw the "NC-17" (under 17 not admitted), she went home and got 16 friends. when she heard that 90% of all crimes occur around he home, she moved. she thinks Taco Bell is where you pay your phone bill. when she missed the 44 bus, she took the 22 bus twice instead. when she took you to the airport and saw a sign that said "Airport Left" she turned around and went home. top

She Was So Blond

she spent 20 minutes looking at the orange juice box because it said "concentrate". she put lipstick on her forehead because she wanted to make up her mind. she told me to meet her at the corner of "WALK" and "DON'T WALK". she thought TuPac Shakur was a Jewish holiday. she tried to put M&M's in alphabetical order. she sat on the TV and watched the couch. she sent me a fax with a stamp on it. she got stabbed in a shoot-out. she tried to drown a fish. top

She Was So Blond

she thought a quarterback was a refund. she got locked in a grocery store and starved to death. if you gave her a penny for intelligence, you'd get change back. they had to burn the school down to get her out of third grade. under "education" on her job application, she put "Hooked On Phonics". she tripped over a cordless phone. she took a ruler to bed to see how long she slept. at the bottom of the application where it says "sign here"...she put "Sagittarius". she asked for a price check at the Dollar Store. top

Story

One or Two Pieces? One day after work, a blonde walked into a pizza parlor and ordered a small personal pizza. When it was finished, the waiter asked the blonde if she wanted it cut into four pieces or eight. The blond thought a bit and said "Better make it four, I'd never be able to eat eight."

Nailed Again Two blond builders were working on a house. One blonde was on a ladder nailing. She'd reach into her nail pouch, pull out a nail, look at it, and either toss it over her shoulder or proceed to nail it into the wood. The other blond couldn't stand it any longer and yelled up, "Why are you throwing some of the nails away?" The first blonde explained, "When I pull it out of my nail pouch, if it's pointed toward me I throw it away. If it's pointed toward the house, then I can use it!" The second blond explained, "Don't throw away those nails that are pointed toward you! They're for the other side of the house!!" top

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